Thursday, August 20, 2009

Musings-Old times

The temple is dark now, within the human limits I wonder? Yesterday rather in an intoxicated mood, I ventured to goto the temple, where I met 2 companiions of the wolf family, who also joined me in this rather peculiar mood, almost impossible to describe.

Shallow are words, and I place no weight in them for the wonders which are to be seen, are rather … peculiar. Distinct with their own taste. The divine comes and moves within this frame to blossom it once more.

Today too, I was rather in that foul mood, which makes one to see. Where there are no limits and no fear, or rather where fear can be seen in almost the most fascinating sense. Of wonder and purpose. But ah! I wonder, do these words mean anything. Even when they form a part of an experience which is the truth. I know now, that everything in this framework of reason, and more is present here and now. All contained and wild in the same moment. So what to speak of what is felt when it could be seen a million times better.

There are 3 shooting stars which I saw tonight on my regular walk near the tcs villa road, which leads to the main road. The weather is to my need at this point and hour of time. And also I saw something which is almost sensless. I felt I saw it first when I went to the temple yesterday night, when in a state of complete silence and darkness, I was seeing the goddess with my eyes almost closed. I saw a golden light at the corner of my eyes. In that absolute darkness I saw gold at the left edge of my eye.

And tonight during the walk, I saw a sort of a phantom in the sky which at first looked like some sort of a telephone wire (as it was very clear to the wires) but then I saw it distinctly move, and it was hollow like a cylinder, I thought it might be due to my poor vision or perhaps my state of being how I was. But I know that I saw it as something different.

These are visions which are pouring out of the framework. Are these visions?

There are points when I can merge together, where I am not like how I am or supposed to be or can be. Here I just am. Without a notion of thought. Blissful in the breadth. But I know this is the calm before the storm. The storm of infinite bliss.

But the path is the pleasure and the joy. The path is life. Lived to state of absolute being – ness. Where by all joys are increased ten fold.

Perhaps this is called love, oh no love does not exist. It is but myself which bends as love.. it is but myself which melts into another. And then creates by myself the notion of love.

It is I and only I who exist. And that is false too.

Bending into framework and breaking away.

I saw it in a dream that I was fading away

At the edges and in the center, there the void

Stood like a vast thorn in the middle of the river

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