Tuesday, May 31, 2011

A New Dawn


There is only one thing worse than a man, who undergoes a personal tragedy. Something perhaps which is soul crushing; trying and seeming to weigh against the freedom of the spirit. That one thing is; if the man survives and then chooses not to learn from his hardship undone upon him.

There is this sense among us all implanted; well if you consider it – its humanities learning mechanism- this race’s true non-sense. I believe that we are true creatures of laziness or inertia of some sort. There are some who actually learn from tragedies among the vast lot of us; all of whom at one point or the other do face personal hazards/tragedies/disappointments- These wilful few make a change in their perceptions/feelings/thoughts/being/life itself to accept and learn from pain, but these few who actually change due to a tragedy- if they care to notice- their hard earned wisdom, takes place when there is this despair looming or past. What I truly fail to understand (for myself) is that why do I not choose to learn anything worthwhile during my mundane daily existence. Its good right? If I am not being shattered, or crushed by some opposition- than that state is verily good. But I think of it not worthy of not teaching me anything. No wisdom to be gained without pain? That's truly a morbid thought, and if that is the truth; then I am afraid humanity is god’s (or whatever’s) sadistic creation without compare.

Maybe humans took the ideation that wisdom cannot be learnt the easy way too seriously. If we care to change, then we could acknowledge all the things which make our lives glorious each and every day and learn (wisdom) from all that touches us even if it doesn’t bring about tragedy or pain along with it. I do look forward to a new dawn


Introduction To Avadhuta Gita


There are many writers of lore; who wrote treatise after another about metaphysical reality yet at the end never forgot (some fucking how) to sign off with their own name(s), there is Sant Kabir/the revered Kalidasa/Tulsidasa/Tukaram and so so many more from India itself… they wrote about being god and being the servant of the divine; yet somehow at the end or even in middle of quatrains never forgot to mention their all important names.

There is nothing wrong with this, but for someone who is trying to share his holy mystical experience, ego is the first thing to banish; not promote, and I a sure each one of the so many scholars and saints had their reasons to do self promotion but at the cost of spreading enlightened thought? That seems ridiculous.

There was Michael Angelo on the other hand (a gifted spirit indeed), who almost never put across his name on any of his creations (I believe excluding one piece). And similarly there was the author(s) of the famed and mystical and little known- Avadhuta Gita.

The Avadhuta is the free one; the innocent one. Similar to a plant or any other life form with little or no ego connection- its there to sustain life on day to day basis; but within this life is something more. Its unified singular present power/consciousness. This is an avadhuta. Completely free from the snares which make ignorance up. This small book containing chapter after chapter of quatrains are full of esoteric and powerful natural knowledge or experience displayed.

The entire ‘book’ or chapters are elucidations on metaphysical unified consciousness, and how anything intermediate is not required. The concept remains that as we all strive in ignorance trying to acquire the original state (perhaps the womb state to many rationalists); the illusion is at the end just illusory, and why paying attention to it only vivifies it. So the avadhuta gita just negates it. It says over and over- no need to pray? who's there to pray to… no need to devote and sacrifice and commit. To whom and what is this done and by whom or what. Its a very profound state indeed.

Couple of the quatrains/couplets go like this:

The mind indeed is of the form of space.
The mind indeed is Omni faced.
The mind is the past.
The mind is all.
But in reality there is no mind

Thus you are One. Why then do you not understand -
that you are the unchangeable One, equally perceived in all?
O mighty One, how can you, who are ever-shining, unrestricted,
think of day and night?

Union and separation exist in regard neither to you nor to me.
There is no you, no me, nor is there this universe.
All is verily the Self alone.

Union and separation exist in regard neither to you nor to me.
There is no you, no me, nor is there this universe.
All is verily the Self alone.

- As you can see; the author understands that even the “act of meditation” is rooted in ignorance. When there is but one, who will try to meditate on the other. Meditation is all that is.

Know all instruments of perception to be
like ethereal space. Know all of perception to be
like ethereal space. Know this pure one as neither bound
nor free. I am the nectar of knowledge,
homogenous existence, like the sky

To those interested, a fairly decent english translation is found on this page: (I picked the above quatrains from there)


Its indeed revelling to see that there are those, who were born in non-duality and died in it as well. Its indeed comforting to endure the world, an illusion with the heart beating completely free- like an avaduta without any false misery


<Mad as a Hatter> with <Hg>


Mercury is a metal, the god of communication and a mysterious element held paramount in both eastern and western alchemy. I have been fascinated by the material since I have known of it.

Needless to say that mercury is highly toxic, over the ages people have used mercury in many day to day uses; there are cases where it was used in the making of hats- which caused mental and physical disorientation to the people; giving rise to the famous saying ‘Mad as a Hatter’ used in Alice in wonderland (for the mad hatter). The god mercury is named after the element because of its swift moving nature. Mercury is very difficult to be contained, its a poor conductor of heat and moderate of electricity.

In Indian tantra/alchemy; mercury is called the semen of shiva. This is the most important element in this spiritual tradition. I possess a special shiva-lingam made on the inside of mercury (called a parad lingam); mercury though toxic is given the status of providing cure for all illness and even enlightenment; in the ayur-veda texts.

Mercury in Indian history is supposed to cure not only all disease but help in the inner transformation-alchemy and give eternal youth! Indian alchemy (called Rasayana- this itself means the way/path to mercury!) states that to try to attune to the ultimate cosmic power- the body and mind must be kept strong and stable- and for this the element remains Mercury.

Mercury has been traditionally used in minute quantities (Indians knew like most other races about the toxic properties of this element) to drink in water; to keep with food, and to make shiva-lingams which saints used to keep close/in touch with the body. Many saints keep these lingams permanently inside the palates of their mouths, in deep contemplation for decades all together.

Yet why is mercury revered so much? I really don’t have a clue for this but there are some special properties to this metal:

1) In tantra *and perhaps even older parts of rk-veda, mercury is seen as an agent to immortality. or eternal youth, it has fallen from “heavens” during the love making act of shiva-shakti. The mercury has to be purified through mantra and dhyana. This is the true alchemical feat; to convert it to remove pollution and grant life.

2) Alchemists (eastern and western) are amazed by mercury’s combining properties with other elements so easily; and all of them (chinese, european and indian) alchemists arrive at the conclusion that mercury possesses unknown powers which can be used to transmute-base metals to gold and also impure to pure (whatever may be the subject)

3) To my understanding, mercury has both material and psychic properties. It has long been speculated (though without evidence) that mercury use was rampant in the flying of “flying vehicles-vimanas” in ancient India, mercury was the fuel for the flight so as to say. apart from this mercury is very close in atomic weight to gold. Its use was hence understandable to create the philosophers stone.

I really don’t know what makes mercury so special. The fact that its so rare in nature itself or the fact that its liquid and yet so dense. or perhaps its the special physio-chemical properties (expansion with temperature and conductivity etc) which makes it unique or just maybe its something which we as normally cannot comprehend. The energy level and its rejuvenating properties (though so poisonous) must be looked upon with seriousness by rational communities (its not a coincidence that cultures across the world have chosen mercury as the god’s element)


Friday, May 27, 2011



Enlightenment is here and now!

Do you choose? Do you choose to enlighten? When? and How?

I can help; so can you. Enlighten yourself; There is no need for proof.

The answer does not exist. The Field and the knower are the same.

There is no label. The game no longer the same. When you choose.

Do you choose? To enlighten. Seeking is oh so futile and the resistance weak. Enlighten; Here and Now. No time remains to be bleak.

The questions cease; The mist clears. The path winds back; to the one who remains ever here.

There is no thunder; no chorus for your mighty empire. It crumbles from where it was made. The feeble mind, and the thoughts it churns as if in a mire.

There is no recourse other than the one which is present (here). There is no solution to death but death as it is.

Do you still choose? To enlighten yourself. To understand and acquiesce all in transitory pleasure and pain. So when will you strike.. A thousand years or a decade? It makes no difference for once you are born.. you are to fade.

I do choose. To be now and here. To be free and clear. To be one and none. To be the divine will done.


-Monet’s Tulips of holland (Pristine!)

Extended Theatrics

I could have been damn good at theatre. Not only did I have the penchant for acting, but I also have (still) a kick ass memory for remembering queues and line. I have been in couple of drama/theatre when I was in school. My favourite was the one which took over 2 years of preparation. This was whilst I was studying in HK, in Delia School of Canada (yea, mostly Canadian and Chinese expats). Our then drama teacher (a really wonderful empathetic soul) called Mr. Michael Blaney, was our instructor/guide/leader/mentor/friend and everything else in between during this time.

I guess most of us involved in the drama were of the same age (mostly 7th and 8th graders!). There was a brief audition (which I could pass with flying colors- hell the drama was in English and I can speak at least that language), followed by months and months and months of regular daily hourly practice. Mr. Blaney wanted us to feel and become the characters, and unfortunately for me this meant the greatest headache of all.

I played the character of an old Chinese man (can you believe that) who keeps rambling about the virtues of his age while condemning the vices of what he saw in front of him (of his grand kids-and friends and what not). The entire play revolved around 3 generations, myself (the oldest of the lot), the parents (played by some of my good friends) and the ‘dudes’ and ‘dudettes’ who didn't give a rats ass in the name of rebellion. The story was common day and didn’t differ much from perhaps everyday reality. The peer pressure, and the angst. The parents demands and the generation gap and of course the loony old man in the corner with his ramblings (fuck!)

So, I had the most lines to remember; cause after every act(parents or grand children-did not matter with whom the previous act ended with).. I had to go off the hook and ramble on for 5-10 odd minutes with great theatrical expressions about the pain I was experiencing even watching the youngsters and their failed attempts to live. Damn; there were months on end when we practiced the play top to bottom day in and out to get to the point where it was absolutely fluent in every persons head.

We arranged for a presentation at school on its annual day, and the play went better than planned. It was fabulous (to the best of my memory it lasted around 45 minutes odd- and mind you out of which 20 odd minutes was my own fucking rambling). We got rave reviews from our school teachers and Mr. Blaney was top of the pops (he had been recruited that year itself for teaching drama and being a class-room resident teacher- he was assuredly one of the most genuine people/teachers I have ever encountered). The cast too got a good clap and well deserved and it was onwards for some careless fun (without the daily practice routine).

This too did not last though, soon enough everyone of us was called by Mr. Blaney to undergo a verbal contract that we would again be able to put forth a show; all of us agreed of course, and we realized that we were to act in front of a public audience (not our school or any other), in one of HK’s kick ass theatre competing with other English language schools from HK/Mainland region. We undertook the damned task of picking up where we left off; taking off the rustic expressions and tones with the former refined states to which we had soared in the previous months. This time the training was more gruelling, cause we could not afford any mistakes at any cost.

The judgement day arrived, and we were given a spacious resting and changing room (my make up took quite some time- turning me into fairy white Chinese man with white hair, and a little paunch and what not!), and all of us were onto the stage once more. This was the first time I was in front of such a huge audience (perhaps over 1000 or 1500 people) who had paid money to see us in action. We were one of the few dramatics that evening; there were also some dance and stage shows and some other stuff which schools had come up with (we were told that other schools though English medium had not the endurance to make a proper formal play and I dont blame them, it took us nearly half a year of rigorous journey to complete the play to the sort of end we would have liked. All of us were polished and became almost the characters we were portraying, I say almost cause we were still adolescents at that time, and perhaps we hadn’t developed advanced skills (though to tooth my own horn, I did receive the best actor award and also accolades from my teacher personally- he told and confided that I did have the stuff to become a good actor later in my life!- something which i cherish and relish till date)

Theatre is fun to see, but yes; to evoke emotion (not from the crowd only) but firstly from yourself- there is a lot and I mean LOT of effort to be put in. Its something which we do everyday; the only difference is; we actually think that our day to day life is not a drama and that the world is not a stage. Smile

Peace and love

Monday, May 23, 2011

Flesh & The Power It Holds


I am a vegetarian by choice. I was by birth too; but during trying times; I don’t mind having flesh/meat to survive. But that’s about how far I can take it. For me, killing to eat does not form a very appetizing thought. I would not want to take another beings life to eat. And if I do so, I realize and accept that someday it will happen to me in one which way or the other.

There are many non-vegetarians (carnivores) who think that eating meat and nothing else will satisfy them, and yes they are right. For I realize (unfortunately a vegan’s realization) that flesh/skin/meat holds raw power. Raw power which ingested and digested adds to the power of the individual. Yes, Yes the power in the form of carbs and fat, but also conscious power- the power which transforms individual tendencies (prakriya) and thought processes. To the best of my understanding- “You are what You Eat” and yes when you digest animals- you inherit their base animalistic tendencies too- which are well what most humans do too- eat, kill more, eat more, and rage till sleep overtakes them.

Well, what I wanted to know of the non-vegetarian ‘race’ amongst us is; why do they stop at eating other animals? Why do they not think of (if not actually implement) eating other human beings too?  What?? its disgusting? Acts of cannibalism in this day and age? Why would anyone do that?

For one; Human meat *those who have tried it (I have not!)* is professed to be the best tasting meat; and also when it comes to the internal organs- all animals have similar tasting organs- so the liver/breast of a chicken would be just as delicious as of a humans (roasted well enough of course). LOL

But I am sure, this thought never crosses a gung-ho meat eater, who is out to kill anything that moves. Why is cannibalism so out of fashion? In reality, its not uncommon amongst many of the surviving/extinct tribes of the world and over 2000 species of animals across the globe actively engage in it for various purposes ranging from sexual to infanticide to of course requirements of food. Cannibalism to my reasoning has only been shunned because it poses a direct threat to human life itself. Otherwise there is no moral fallout to the concept of eating meat right? Does the source really matter, especially when the meat is the best one available?? I really would like to know (from the horse’s mouth- the meat tearing flesh eating people of the world)

Now, did you know that modern human beings actually ate up their ancestors- yes people of the pre-Neolithic age (hunter gatherers) were actively consumed by the modern day farmer counterparts- during times of drought and crop failure. There are innumerable examples of such scenarios from everywhere around the world… so what makes YOU stop eating another human being? (This is a proven fact that many times over across the world- tribes and warring groups ate the dead of the antagonists to show/prove their superiority, cultural and otherwise- but this is direct correlation with what I understand, flesh has the power- occult/spiritual/causal which can make one person ‘stronger’ than another- and hence its so addictive to so many carnivores in the world)

You would (if you could) think about it; and perhaps come to the conclusion that the fact that you would not be able to do something which you feel against- as killing someone else for your food- this would bring about the empathy/sympathy that you too might be in such conditions to be eaten- and would hence pose as a deterrent. You could feel the other person has a family; someone who cares for them, hell they are just like you… how could you do something horrendous to someone like that….? or maybe you would come to the “naive” and shit faced conclusion that humans are more important than other life forms- they are smarter/stronger or some fuck up and hence deserve to be here, while others are expendable (and I really PITY such crude logic when it comes to the fore in humans)

And yes, then I would believe that you are a hypocrite. The most abundant (over a billion useless people in this wretched land itself!) and freshest meat in the world off the back of human being and you aren’t willing to take a bite? What type of macho meat eater would you be? You are a coward; eating something packed and roasted in a plastic- not knowing whether that life had something in common to you or ever caring to know in the first place. How could you kill something/someone who you had affection towards? Who you could sympathize with… and yes you might not sympathize to a chicken wailing or a cow crying before its slaughter. But then why such steep narrow moral standards when it comes to human beings- who are little or no better than these animals (most often worse than them- never minding their own natural business). At least the animals were not hypocrites. They ate whatever they could. Without a blind sightedness which humans are consumed with.

Next time you abhor something like cannibalism; you must take a look to the human condition (including your own), at least wild cannibals are true to their state of meat eating- (and cannibals give up other meat BECAUSE again its proclaimed that human meat is the best/most powerful of all); unlike you connoisseurs of fine dining who like some dead rotting flesh to be served to you; which you are not strong or willing enough to kill; which you are not strong or willing enough to atone (its sacrifice); yet are willing to devour down incessantly like some sort of ignorant fool; who does not understand the power of flesh; yet is addicted to it like a maggot.

(PS: I find that most non-vegetarians have never even witnessed the cruel death of something they are going to consume with relish. Perhaps they should, it might bring some perspective to the actions their stomach inspire!)

and I do not favour the death of anything/anyone for sheer consumption by another.


Friday, May 20, 2011

The Night Life @ Kaup


Sorry, but the title is a bit misleading for us city folk. We think of night life as decking ourselves up; driving through the weekend traffic and heading out to a dingy room with discourteous barkeepers and waiters and dancing through smoke and sweat; seeing some shiny disco balls and perhaps getting felt up as the highlight of the night!

But @ Kaup; its always something else. This is one of the more famous beaches close to udupi/manipal on the south western coast of India (state of Karnataka). For decades, students from manipal colleges have been visiting this beach for freaking and having some open air fun. And I must admit I have been no exception.

Kaup (pronounced ka-pu); is a clean stretch with no tourist nonsense (until the time I was there), couple of shops which keep the usual eatables and drinkables (toddy from close by village is a must!) for the student population. And oh I forgot to mention the beautiful scenic lighthouse which exists (now over 100 years old!). The lighthouse is a sight to see at night (not too tall, but the perfect structure for the place).. the single light pouring through darkness; a beam cutting into the night (so it always seems to me). It also divides the beach into almost two equal halves. The best thing is, that you can climb it up with a ticket till evening to see the awesome view 360 degrees abound. There is the mighty blue ocean on one side, and the endless green on the other. Its a beautiful sight to see from the elevation! (I have had the good fortune of seeing the rain clouds approaching and almost blowing me off the lighthouse, its extremely soul quenching!)

Well, I will tell you about the very first time I went to kaup with my friends (I guess they were- Alap, Sandeep Patel, Roop, Joy, Arvind Patravali). We took a bus from udupi and within half and hour reached to the town kaup, from there its a 20 odd minute walk into the village area. We cut through just in time while keeping our sights on the beautiful sunset, This was our first time, and we did not know our exact bearings.. and took casual time to explore the countryside (it was the first time for all of us looking at the real clean beautiful Indian countryside).

By the time we could hear waves close by, it had become dark and fast. The night was clear (and no moon in sight), and LO! within a period of minutes the entire scenery became dimly illuminated- No; not from any artificial lamp/light or the moon. It were the STARS! above us, around us. enveloping us.. I had never had the pleasure of seeing such a skyline of space ever before (and I have seen clear skies outside cities).

This was one of the very rare instances which I got to see (this being the very first) the beautiful akasha ganga- our own galaxy- milky way! It was too much, we all could see the thick necklace- the beautiful band of stars which formed the part of our own galaxy! We all must have heard about it, cause we concluded it to be this, but wow; I cant remember anything as precious ever which my eyes had witnessed. I remember all of us walking looking up and not in front to the beautiful empty virgin beach (most students retreat this place too by evening- especially couples lol). We spent umpteen time over there, idling and gazing at the stars- jewels adorning the neck of the infinite sky and space. It was imprinted in my brain. It was something which I could never forget (being the city bum that I am).

The place is magical in its own right; for at kaup (and many other places in and around manipal itself)- where there were at that time no neon lights to spoil the night sky- were the perfect sights to lay down on the grass or sand, look up without any concentration to see the most and i do mean MOST amount of varied colourful and out of the world (literally) shooting stars/meteors. It is truly a sight to see, almost every other second a brilliant streak through the night sky… and all through the night! I tell you, I have never been so bored of making magical wishes one after the other!

The roaring beaches at night, the beautiful un matched pristine night sky with stars and starlight, the shooting stars interspersed between these eternal twinkles of the night and you feel thoroughly blessed to be a part of nature; Yea this is when a decently smart person can understand (like I did), that to be part of nature is this life’s work enough; I don’t have to go and be gung-ho and change nothing, Everything is perfect the way it is! The way it should and must be.


Wednesday, May 18, 2011

You are a Tree(t)


You too are a tree in the making. Or have you already been made/saved?

Your wisdom is rooted to the ground. The earth and its life renewing soil, which creates the body you so adore; and finally absorbs it too to sustain others lives. Your wisdom like the roots of the ancient tree; is deep within (you), it expands in all directions absorbing the nectar/water to give and sustain your individual life. Your roots (the experiences that maketh-you) are your foundation. Why not make them strong and enduring like this mammoth tree of life itself?

Your branches/passion/individuality extend upwards towards the infinite blue sky (akasha-ether-the fifth element). Your aim flawless moves towards the golden powerful sun, towards and into the fire that burns in your heart. Its the source of everything potent; the power of the atom. Its within you too. Look deep and revel in its blinding light! Just like the mammoth tree ever erect in its naive innocence to capture (the sublime akasha and the sun which pervades within it!)

Your deepest glow; your sensual enigma; Your ethereal ‘presence’ are the flowers the bloom all over this mighty ancient tree. Its a treat to see these enchanting wild flowers of all colour and form, of all sizes and patterns glistening and spreading wild erotic scents towards the world and way beyond. This is you too oh lover of life! Your essence becomes the intoxicating scent that this world oh so requires and now!

Your life complete is the fruit. Its the bestowment towards the betterment and continuation of this sacred eternal river of life/lives. Here and now. Make yourself and break yourself so you can be saved by grace. So you may save ‘others’ through yours!

You are the shelter and You are verily life! You shade those who eat at you and rot your ‘insides’- the innumerable parasites/vermin. You are patient and mighty in being just like the ancient tree.

Ever understanding that all worldly ideals and principles merge back into glorious silence…You see life without perception/In eternal silence; Yes you are such too! In silence you help those who need (you). In laughter with the blowing wind (which alleviates the sick and diseased), you are the mighty cool shade which protects and preserves all there is to come.

You will bind the soil (of the ignorant) into one single conscious entity. Grow in peace with all there has even been.

Would you not want to be such a tree. Such a treat?

It makes you what you were meant to be in the first place.

Peace !

Monday, May 16, 2011

The Thinker…

(A thinker sees not the power which makes/breaks him. For then he must stop thinking and start being)

- The Thinker/Rodin/France

He is searching, and seeking. In a complete rut; he wants and needs something to set him free?! Yet he deceives himself with this satisfaction of extra ordinary knowledge. Will not change a single thing, what remains the use of this idle seeking?

When the real knowledge eludes him no end. Looking for an elixir to let it all be- his lofty ideal; what's the use mighty thinker if you don’t let go and let it all be by yourself? .

There is no use and point, and this is what baffles your mind the most. For your goal is no longer tasting divine, its no longer the effort your mind has put into this trial.

He is not wise, he is verily a thief. He thinks he owns the jewels of wisdom and he runs day and night helter skelter away from the unmistakable truth (out to get him). His thoughts do not matter, his ideas will not enlighten. For now he sees; that enlightenment is buried in a casket; a casket which lowered into the ground, cannot be deciphered or thought of as anything or anyone unique.

You pleased your mind with the pursuit of knowledge, and that is where it all ended. The pursuit was your game and content-ment far from your chosen reality. You loved to pursue your paradise with the very fact that you could not even fathom it with your mind! What use remains your learning, when your insides rest deep inside (the earth!?)

Humble remains the wise, he has not the thirst anymore. Which you oh lofty thinker couldn’t believe as anything more than a chore. Your glory remains the attention you need. You reek of petty and you verily deceive!

The thinker is a fine state to be in, when your mind is bored and lonely. You can think the world up and down. Quote a legend and make all the bloody sound. But in the end; the pit for your grave remains un-named, whether you were a thinker or a saint! Laughing out loud

Looks like Rodin drew inspiration from this/or such people?

Peace and Love

~Full May Moon~

Shri Mahavidyas: BagalaMukhi


Deliver us from evil, magik which aims to slay. Pray to the crane necked/faced goddess; who keeps all things malign at bay. Pray in reverence and not for personal ego satisfaction and see what happens in your day to day. You will be delivered from evil eye and jealousy. From wrath; lust and greed. Pray for the only boon which counts. To remove the poisonous misery which man makes against another.

The goddess is the eighth great power of reckoning. She is the one who offers you the access to the six wrathful rites of tantra- which can cause demise to your enemy, make you conquer and rule, cause disease and death to those who oppose you. She is prayed sincerely by the left hand path and will offer you protection against the powers which come against your progress in the material and spirit planes.

She is called the ‘paralyser’ for she will cause stambhana- a method which makes the mind and body to get glued to inertia (though traditionally she is shown to paralyse the tongue of the enemy- holding the demon/enemy’s tongue and a mace/weapon on the other hand to destroy).

This is used in tantra to conquer those who oppose. Their minds get wasted and their bodies decay. She paralyses the enemy, and offers power to the adept in return. For bagalamukhi is the power of the opposite manifesting complete- where false victory is; there imminent defeat. Where material wasting; there spiritual illumination, where uncontrollable lust; there unconditional love. She shows the divine manifestation of infinity *8*. The mighty dual. The etheric double.

She is not to be prayed to lightly; she is indeed a mighty cross to bear. She is not your personal saviour, she is the mother of every energetic force born to fruition. She is not a tantric deity. She is the end complete.

She is yellow like the sun, fierce like fury. Sublime like nectar and offering the wise glory. She arrests those impure; their tongue/penis/clitoris immobile to cause any more (detest). She redeems those still and sound. Who have not lost faith; who lose no ground (in sleep ignorance). She offers man path to glory. Where you lose your prana and at her feet rest your story.

- The powerful visual representation for mother bagalamukhi/pitambara

Peace and Love

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Esoteric Representations


There are couple of esoteric representations present in world myths/symbols which I thought would require clarifications beneficial for those interested.

1) The Conquering of serpent Kaliya by Krishna:

So the myth goes that there was this dangerous huge 5 headed snake in the river Yamuna (flowing in north India); who terrorised all the local inhabitants abound. Krishna the warrior prince came over and at the behest of people went and conquered the snake; he actually danced on the serpents head to subdue and pronounce victory:

The esoteric representation:

Well every mythical account in the history of human evolution has a link with direct experience of the occult (spiritual/other worldly phenomenon). Here Krishna is conquering the serpent power of his within; The serpent power- Kundalini is the ego force in human beings, located at the base of the spine; when Krishna is shown dancing over this snake; it goes to show the exact moment of transcendence (Krishna is a boy when this happens- just entered puberty/adulthood) into ego-less god head. Also the river chosen is Yamuna. In Indian mythology; ganga is representation of solar energy or the Pingala nadi/nerve which flows from the base to the right nostril. Yamuna is representative of the Ida channel- the lunar/moon energy which flows to the left nostril- traditionally Krishna worship is done via bhakti- love et all which involves the over use of ida channel/moon channel to raise the kundalini. Hence esoteric representation uses Yamuna in this particular iconography.

2) The Story of Adam and Eve:

In Christian mythology; the earliest iconography depicts the garden of paradise where initially man and later his counterpart; woman was made. They were innocent – which goes to say that they had not experienced the sexual energy present within themselves- a state of pre-pubescent life.

So there are fruits everywhere; and on the tree of life/knowledge hangs the apple of desire and the snake comes over and tempts both of them to take a bite and revel in life’s passion. This moment for long is depicted as the fall of man from divinity into mortality.

The Esoteric Representation:

The representation of the Tree and the snake is very common in almost all pre-Christian religions as well, most cases they represent something good rather than what is portrayed in Christianity. Well here the tree is to represent the spinal column (in most representations of a tree- it goes to show the human spinal column held erect/vertical unlike spines of other life forms). The snake here again is the powerful serpent-kundalini/ the individual ego force. Before the both Adam/eve took the fruit; they remained almost in blissful ignorance. As soon as they consumed it, their serpent powers became active, they became aware of individuality (which is seen by Christians- as shame/ because they supposedly became aware of their private parts). The tree is actually called the tree of wisdom/tree of knowledge of good and evil…. I believe that this myth would have been borrowed by more ancient tribes who used it to depict the route which man takes from innocence at birth to knowledge of his individual sexual energy and form which leads over time and experience to wisdom and true understanding of good and evil. The Christians haphazardly condemn the snake, which is the only way one can forget and then realize their own divinity (think about it, why we all live is to fall down from grace so we may live the hard life and realize the state of grace/god hood once more.. and so it is with the initial life forms/Adam and eve)


3) Hippocrates and the rod of Asclepius:

The most popular symbol of medicine (the only one too) is the mythical rod of Asclepius which is a snake intertwined along the staff. The other most commonly used symbol; is the rod of Caduceus (both borrowed from ancient Greek myths)… the caduceus is similar to the former, but has two snakes intertwined instead of one (it is seen as the hand of mercury; the communicator).

--The above shows the rods of Asclepius and caduceus. 

The Esoteric Representation:

There is a profound difference in both the representation. Again to do (you guessed it) with the serpent power (hell these are serpents depicted!). As I said, the base of the spine- which here and most other human myths are represented by an erect staff- which (as I also said before) represents the erect homo sapiens spinal column.

The Caduceus represents the major two nerves/nadis which flow from the base of the spine-muladhara to the top till the nostrils… and clearly you can see that the snakes end before the wings depicted, because the wings are the seventh seat of consciousness- sahasrara. Which depicts flight from the human to the divine! and is located above the head.

The Asclepius is showing a single snake- this is not representative of a nerve and rather it shows the real serpent/kundalini/feminine ego power ascend from the bottom of the spine to the top of head.

Now you ask why the Asclepius is shown to be the symbol of medicine (it was the staff of Asclepius). There are many explanations but the central esoteric one remains that the key to good health is the rising of this ancient and only force of the universe, and in turn all diseases which rise are due to the self power being hidden or inactive. The true disease is ignorance, manifesting itself through the mind which affects the entire body. The key to perpetual good health and longevity is in the awakening of the self power, upwards through the meru-danda (the stick of meru! or in this case the stick of Asclepius!-the spinal column) and dissolving the illusion.

Sadly most people look to these esoteric representations and see snakes where there are none, people terrified or in awe of snakes- where there are none. The true meanings are and have always been internal and microcosmic.

Time then to look inwards. Time has always been such!


Saturday, May 14, 2011

Everyone Will Get Theirs…Now and Here!


Everyone of us cribs that we don’t get what we deserve, especially when we look at potential; perpetual sinners who con their way ‘'ahead’ of us in life.

Let me give you a hypothetical example,

You have been waiting lets say in front of an Indian government building, for a long time in queue and in the sweltering heat to get your turn. There a fool suddenly arrives who goes to the front of the line and starts sweet talking with his ‘pal’ and before you know it, his turn has arrived. That's not all, this guy does not take the usual 2 minutes for his process, he is uneducated, illiterate and obtuse and takes up all the time till its time for office to shut down

Now; I have gone through harsh times as well as good times, yet there is one quality of mine which has kept me in good stead throughout. I wait, I am patient and look for the time which is mine. There is an old saying; ‘What goes up, must come down’. This applies to everyone of us too. We all strive to be the best or at the peak of our careers, lives, relations what not… and we all want it; nay, need it right now. That's where it goes all awry. Many people use others, abuse others to get to the pedestal they choose. Yes they get there, but no they cannot stay there…. the strange real powerful fact of life.

Life in its entirety with all its causal effects is cyclical. Everything comes a full circle. You born- you die- you reborn. You get to the top of you petty ladder- you fall down to the bottom- and you start up/down wherever again. Everything happens such, I have seen it- hell everyone of us has seen it, then why still the crab mentality to get there first and why not last. What difference does it make?

Yes it makes a difference, if you choose to accept and entertain the notion that everyone is equal and life will give everyone their deserved chance. If something like this is true, then it gives us patience and stride to do our own thing without bothering about the trivialities which someone else is pursuing in closet jealousy or envy.

So someone is doing great at their work (it seems to be the fucking fascination of this generation), someone has got a handsome groom (the second most serious fascination of us mortals). Someone is partying more or has got more luck… it all is good; for all you have to do IS NOT BE MEEK, yet keep a solemn patient fervour and do what you choose to. Expanding life and not contracting it by this constant jealous ego expression that somehow all us 21st century folks seem to easily incorporate.

What I am saying in short (and long) is that; though many might have not seen or felt the cyclic tendencies which life propels; I have. So everyone who once was great will not be so, those who will be meek shall not be so (look at the revolution of our times; here and now!). Keep a keen eye and be kind, life is waiting to reward all those in turn and full who keep wisdom in their hearts, and the great equaliser in their minds.

- The sacrament of Last Supper/Salvador Dali

Peace & Love

The Sheer Power of Kateel


There is a place on the outskirts of Mangalore (around 30 kms odd) on the west coast of India, in the state of Karnataka (It is around 50 km from the city of manipal, where I studied many years back). The place is a small town which now lies on route to the Mangalore airport… The holy and powerful place of Kateel goddess lies here. The goddess here is fiery durga, who is victorious in battle and unmatched when it comes to power and divine grace.

I always made it a point to visit this temple whenever I had a flight to hop on or off from… I don’t know how or why, but the time I got to know of this temple, I had to visit it; there are many many temples in this area, but this is particularly legendry; There are many stories attached to the temple but most famous (which I think most konkani’s and mangalorians would know from childhood is) that as the goddess temple is located as an island in between the river Nandini; and over the last 50 years whenever this river used to become furious and heavy; threatening to submerge all land around it (due to the excessive rain-downpour which perennially occurs in this region)… it would never ever rise above the level of the temple… Goddess here keeps the fiery Nandini below her always, and keeping the coastal folks safe. Kateel itself means the waist of the river I believe, and though most of the year the river is a mere trickle but its a delight to see it in full force during the Indian monsoons.

The goddess idol is particular too, its probably the only place where I have seen the imagery of a sitting goddess, here the idol is but a mere 3-4 feet from the ground; she is sitting on her seat and holds a chakra and conch while offering protection and liberation to her devotees.

Though I am not religious about temples, but I found this place full of invigorating power and energy, I don’t know how to describe it but there is a sheer lightening effect which takes place when you enter the sanctum and look at the idol. The idol looks very very powerful indeed. Small and dressed in gold and ornaments; she looks fiery none the less.. as if always ready to slay the ignorance and promote the love of self.

Its a treat to go there if you are on way to Mangalore airport. It comes on the way and it would take you mere moments before you realize what I wrote is indeed the truth!

Love and Peace~

Friday, May 13, 2011

~The Surreal Aim At Arunachala~

There are two major holy power places for a shaivite (a shiva path follower) in India, One is in extreme north- Mount Kailas and mansarover which now lies in China, and the other in extreme south in tamilnadu called the hill of Arunachala.
Well Kailas is the abode of Shiva, its where he lives, but arunachala is a lonely hill (almost surrounded by barren fields for over 50 off kms everywhere). Arunachala towers up, and its pointed and alone, This is not where Shiva stays, this is who Shiva is. the hillock is considered the shiva-linga itself. The hill is the god. Its so beautiful that Indians can and do find and worship divinity wherever they can lay their sights upon. (its one thing to do idol worship- but when everything you see is the idol- then you do non-dual worship)
The mythology behind the form of Shiva appearing here is as follows (most of us would have heard it)
One day lord brahma and lord Vishnu had some sort of ego tussle to see who is the greater more powerful god amongst them, so as they couldn’t solve it themselves, they go to Shiva and ask him to resolve this issue. Shiva sets up a test, he says that brahma must go up and try to find his (Shiva) head and Vishnu must go and find his feet, and there is a flower which they must get back as proof (I forget the flowers name).
So brahma goes up but Shiva extends into infinity above; so brahma cheats and just plucks the flower from the earth and comes back, while Vishnu becomes a boar and starts digging under ground to see Shiva's feet, and he is unable to find it.. being humble Vishnu accepts defeat and comes back empty handed. This blazing column which Shiva becomes to test both the gods is Arunachala itself. It is a blazing pillar of fire, and hence arunachala is the centre of fire worship and the fire-element shiva linga is situated here. Well shiva brands brahma a cheat and liar and tells that there would be no more brahma worship held anywhere and Vishnu is held victorious… and the myth ends. The result is that the pillar of fire is made into stone and consecrated as the holy mountain arunachala itself~
Well I had the lovely fortune of going and spending some time at arunachala (I actually went during a powerful full moon night- where perhaps around or more than a lakh pilgrims do “giri-velam”- or circumambulation of the holy hill barefoot all night long- which spans over 10 kms). Well I did not do that, but I did visit the hill, Most pilgrims who walk on this hill do so barefoot- and believe you me there is no path to walk upon which is kind to the sole of the feet, and yet its so inspiring to see men and women walk around cruel rocks laden in the name of a path without flinching or cribbing all year around for eons till date!
There was a very funny or incidental thing which happened to me when I stepped on this holy mountain, There is a small forest gate which one must cross through to enter into the hill (as its a forest conservation region)… well the very first step of mine onto the hill coincided with a pellet/rock fired at me by a small kid who was sitting at a distance; which hit me on my left temple (right next to my left eye). I at that point was thinking something; whether I should take my sandals off to step in; and with my first step a rock changed my mental tapestry for moments all together; everything blanked out and I was without memory. I don’t think it was my thought which provoked it or anything; but I believe the holy hill gave me a good reckoning… sometimes it happens like this; a direct physical jolt to the body changes the energy configuration of the system… I should have had the grace to accept what hit me as beneficial, but I as usual lost my cool and went to the kid who was playing robin hood with his weapon and shouted at him… I was mad cause I thought that if the rock hit my eye; I would have been blind, but I cooled down and continued with my walk without anything else much significant taking place. I reached the place where the sage ramana maharshi stayed for over a decade before descending to the foothills in silence. The place is surreal, the view 360 degrees of the plains and the arunachaleshwar fire temple is beautiful to say the least. The silent meditation if only for a short duration in the ashram on the hill was rejuvenating. The aim of Shiva in the guise of a kid had been perfect; I now understand in retrospect. It made me overflow in the love that is Shiva-consciousness~
There are more foreigners who visit this place than the average middle class Indian over the years because us folks who live and thrive in this country still don’t know the significance of this beautiful and silent power place, the hill still claims to host divine beings of light and energy (siddhas and maunis), some in physical and others in energy form. There are also inaccessible places present and the average trekker is not advised to venture into many parts of the hill, There is also presence of secret kund and trees which appear to those in silent power meditation apart from secret tunnels which supposedly lead to the sanctum of the temple, which the siddhas travel by to worship without being seen one bit.
Its a treat to visit the place, you don't have to be a holy person or pilgrim or religious or superstitious to see the power and peace which arunchala has exuded over lifetimes…. that's the thing with power places, the less mental stigma or rigidity you possess; the greater the chances that something extraordinary and beneficial will happen once you are there. That has always been my experience.
Peace and Thavam~

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Insanely French


They have a popular saying in Paris;

The only thing sane in Paris is the river Seine (pronounced ‘sane’).

And how I agree with them, the French are non-conformists to any and all singular line of thought(s) or behaviour. They unlike the stern upper lipped English counterparts; regularly go out of their heads, through any which means possible and this is accepted if not revered in their society. Yea, this form of thinking is actually encouraged.

This is not to say the French are an open society in all respects, what I know of them- they would never ever disclose their income or economic status; though they are extremely hierarchical in that respect (they won’t tell you how much they earn though it can be seen by the way they dress, eat and treat their fellow man-nearly half a century ago, their maids could not use the elevators reserved for their masters and had to use the stairs instead). They would also never tell you who they vote for or what their political views are ever… well there are many such idiosyncrasies they possess but one of the things which caught my attention recently is—>

I had the fortune of visiting Paris recently for a couple of days and in that time I went for a show, well it wasn’t a regular show- its called ‘Paradis latin’ or Paradise of Latin (the theatre is located in Latin street and its a very old construction designed by gustav eiffel himself- the building and its pillars are gorgeous though small).

The show is a great hit and most people who come to Paris view it (many locals on a night out also visit it). Amongst the audience were people from norway, australia, England, india etc…. well the show is a cabaret mixed with some juggling, dancing, trapeze and some awesome singing by the lead artist (who is currently Maria I believe) and before you know it, the one and half hours pass by quickly; with the help of the complimentary wine/champagne of course!

The great irony or well the insanity which I found in this event is (and this is purely from the viewpoint of an Indian mind you!) is that this is a formal event. Well its been toned down to accommodate tourists now and then and yet its a shirt-tie kind of deal. Its not that you can go there in your jeans and slippers (though as I said they accommodate tourists sometimes who don’t have the proper attire). So you dress up and go to the show and you check out topless and at times completely nude women and men (well mostly women Smile -thank the lord for THAT) for a period of an hour or more…. this is so ridiculous to me, why the hell do I have to dress up to see a refined cabaret or sleaze show/entertainment? Doesn’t that strike you as weird if not completely out of it ???

It did for me, and I laughed as soon as the show began and didn’t  stop chuckling till it ended, its an awesome performance, though the synchronisation of all the dancers is not perfect at all times, but the lack of clothes makes up for those little errors lol. And everyone in the audience comes decked up nice to come and check out some topless dancers in the name of art… as I said in the beginning, the only think sane in the city of Paris, is the river seine!


Monday, May 9, 2011

The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam-I

This ‘book’ can be treated as more than drunken poetry or a Sufi's attempt to elucidate spirit love. Each verse/couplet has esoteric meanings hidden just like most Indian texts on the subject of divinity or such.
I have tried other people’s commentary and translation on the various topics present in the rubbaiyyat. Though there are references to the mundane events and people in certain couplets; yet omar khayyam keeps most of the couplets as esoteric and hidden as they can get. Most people read this famous treatise on Sufi love and think of it as some madman in love for the supreme godhead. Yet most verses offer a different worldly perspective for the ones in dire need for liberation.
The translation (there are numerous of them) which I like most is by Edward Fitzgerald (this is the most comprehensive and famous too perhaps). The reason translations are advisable is not because one can’t decipher the meaning from the literal translation; but as the quatrains can point to various meanings, the most suitable depending upon the age/time of khayyam and the immediate environment too must be taken into consideration (which I believe fitzgerald has done marvellously)
The Quatrain which I love to read over:
Up from Earth's Centre through the seventh Gate
I rose, and on the Throne of Saturn sate,
And many Knots unravel'd by the Road;
But not the Knot of Human Death and Fate
The literal and esoteric translations of this quatrain for a long time did not make any sense to me, it seemed to be very very tantric but I in my foolishness did not give khayyam credit for the worthy knowledge and experience he possessed. Then one day it struck me :
The earths centre here refers to – The base of the spine, the energy centre close to the sexual reproductive organs- which in Sanskrit texts is known as ‘Muladhara’ / The earth center by definition. This centre holds the individual ego powered energy which in simple English refers to the individual ego. I personally call this as Kundalini- the female serpentine energy – non mythical, and the causality of the entire illusion of personal history and creation.
The seventh gate here refers to the top of head – in Sanskrit its known as the seventh chakra (energy center) – sahasrara (refer to post – ). There are seven such energy centres along the spinal column of the erect homo sapiens. Each energy centre is progressively pierced by the rising earth force- kundalini during the unlearning process of enlightenment.(seven gates from the earth center- muladhara, svaddhistana, manipura, anahata, visuddha, ajna, sahasrara)
Sitting on the throne of Saturn is a very metaphorical yet powerful statement- Saturn/Satan/Shani and so forth is the seventh known planet in the solar system (moon was considered a planet as well in olden times), Saturn is considered as the biggest planet and hence its gravitational effects in astrology are felt to be strongest. Saturn in Indian context refers to a planet giving enlightenment. It gives spiritual knowledge and freedom from mundane pursuits.
Hence sitting on the throne of Saturn- refers to the process of achieving one’s original state. Its not the illusory I condition, and it refers to freedom from the world.
Now Omar, refers in more detail regarding the journey to sitting on the throne of Saturn- there were many knots unravelled by the road. In Indian tantra and texts- there are roughly three major granthis or knots the Individual ego power- kundalini has to ‘unknot’ before reaching the top of the head- sahasrara/ The three knots simply are called the shiva/vishnu/brahma knots. So it looks like even omar had to unknot these on his journey of self discovery.
But the last line is the most difficult to comprehend. He continues to say though he had unknotted and reached the top of his journey to evolution and enlightenment, yet he could not find the key to remove human death and fate. He is trying to impart powerful wisdom here- though you are enlightened and death and fate exist not for you anymore, but for the person who is still dawning the rose colored glasses of maya- there is no reprieve from human fate or death.
And this is true, every saint or Sufi who has been enlightened has not been free (or so it seems to us) from the entanglements of human mortality or fate. This is a way of saying that enlightenment has nothing to do with this. If you are looking to avert your karma- action/reaction/ranu-bandana or such or trying to reach immortality in the guise of enlightening yourself- then you might be sorely disappointed.

Ode to Humanity

I am not a big fan of human kind, the version of life that in today’s day seems to be only focused upon itself. The day’s pass and humans ...